Dating men 20 years older than me

Anyone who’s been in a serious long-term relationship knows the journey isn’t without certain challenges, and when you’re dating an older man—we’re talking a decade or more—things can get even trickier.

I know this firsthand, as I’m 25 years old, and I’ve been dating an older guy nearly 15 years my senior for almost four years.

Persistence also takes confidence—my boyfriend extended three invitations before I finally agreed to get coffee with him.

As Aaliyah once said, “If at first you don’t succeed, dust yourself off and try again.” Older men know this. I won’t lie: It can be annoying at times dating someone who has “been there/done that,” but it can also be helpful when your partner can use his experiences to guide you.

That said, there are not-so-little things that can cause friction too.

Keeping in mind what I’ve learned from my own relationship and anecdotes I’ve picked up from women in similar situations, I’ve outlined the perks and challenges of dating an older man. I get asked a lot of questions about my boyfriend’s finances (why else would I date someone much older, right? It’s not actually anybody’s business, but I can tell you that I’ve never dated anyone because of money.

Well, I was (and still am) friends with a select crew of musicians and creatives in Los Angeles, and my boyfriend happened to be a part of that scene.He just didn’t get that and wanted to be around every second.I don’t necessarily think that he wanted to hang exclusively with me all the time, but I think he felt insecure that I’d meet other guys when I went out with friends.While you figure out the math, let me be clear that I’ve met several other women in their early- to mid-20s who also prefer to date from a much older pool for various reasons.And while cliché dictates that, sure, men are into it, there’s been some recent research done about younger females often gravitate toward mature men.

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